Friday, September 10, 2010

I Praise God For...

I write letters in a notebook every day. I have since the beginning of 2010. These letters were originally addressed to the young woman I believed I was meant to marry, but recently they have changed from letters to my unknown future wife to letters to God.

As in the rest of life, I find it hard sometimes to express my thoughts when I’m praying verbally, and the opportunity to write my daily life out as a prayer has come more naturally to me than I expected. I call them my “daily letters”.

This is an excerpt from those “daily letters” written on August 31, on the bus ride to Journey to the Heart.

_______________________



On the way there we are supposed to think of ten things we are each thankful for. I don’t think this should be too hard for me.



One. I am thankful for forgiveness and healing. Both forgiveness I’ve been given by my parents, and by you, as well as the releasing healing of forgiving others. I know I still struggle with resentment and grudges, but with you I press on, because you have forgiven me.



Two. I am thankful for heritage. This involves many facets. Primarily among them is my family, namely my parents. The family I was created to be a part of is not perfect, far from it, but my parents have been long suffering, taking your path with faith and grace. I am proud of the parents I’ve been given, as well as the family line they pass to me. From physical traits inherited, to personality traits taught, I love who I am in my family.



Three. I am thankful for nationality. Like with my family it is not a choice of mine where and when I was born. I am and American. My love for this aspect of my heritage is tied to my desire to draw close to you. If I desire to see my nation be great, then I must desire to draw closer to you myself. There is no greater service I can do for my country.



Four. I am thankful for destiny. You, father, have a plan or me than is unique. I have been created by you to fulfill your purpose in a way no one else can. This destiny is all encompassing. It involves my past: who I have been, how I have grown to be what I am not, and what things have happened to make me who I am. I did not make myself. It involves my future; what I'll become. I have faith that you will shape me. You are in control



Five. I am thankful for Verity. Part of becoming who I am supposed to be is here. Though I may disagree with the theology of some of the leadership, I know this is where I am meant to be. You are growing me like a vine. This is your vineyard for me.



Six. I am thankful for SSI. The organization, leadership, and teaching I received over those weeks are a large part of who I am and who I have become. Attending that camp, and working for Mr. Muffett and Mr. Visscher shaped my worldview. Though things have changed for them in some of our eyes, the program is blessed of you. May it continue to be a blessing to other young people.



Seven. I am thankful for my wife. Though I don’t know her face yet, I love her as Christ loves the church. I want to lift her up to you always. I am thankful for her grace and love for me. For her heard and mind. I am especially thankful doe her because, more than any other person in my life, she will have shown me greatest forgiveness by accepting me in spite of the many times and ways I have already been unfaithful to her. She is your give to me, and I praise you for the beauty that she is.



Eight. I am thankful for fellowship. The people you have brought into my live and taken away. They have all impacted me, in ways both known and unknown. I am thankful for David Auge, my roommate, who I appreciate and care for. He challenges me and helps me through those challenges. I could not ask for someone better as a roommate. Peter Rupp, Tyler, Josh Austhof, Jordan, Josh Ingersol; Cameron, Alex, Elisa, Kayla, Sarah and Gem. Brent back home who has been stead and faithful, holding me accountable and always being reliable. So many more friends I could name. Bless them all in your care.



Nine. I am thankful for the physical gifts I’ve been given. Nothing I own is from my own hands. From my computer, to my car. My camera, swords, I-Pods, pocket watch, knives, fountain pen, and notebook… the list goes on. These gifts I hold dear; you have blessed them. Many times they should have failed , broken, died, or been lost, yet you sustained them to me. You have been faithful to me thru them beyond what I deserve.



Ten. I am thankful for my life. All these things I have listed are not of my doing. They are memories and blessings. Gifts of favor from you, Almighty father.