Monday, November 10, 2008

Nanowrimo

Nov. is National Novel Writing Month, and in participating in it, i have decided to work on The War of the Eagle every day, in hopes to get from my current 68 pages to 100 by the end of the month. THis being the case, this will be my only blog in the month of November.

Enjoy the Robbeness.


YOU fill in the blanks about ME, even if you don't have any idea what they are, and send it back to ME. But first post a blank one so all your friends can return the favor to you....if you have time, go for it!

My name:
Who is the love of my life:
Where did we (love of life and I) meet:
Take a stab at my middle name:
How long have you known me:
When is the last time that we saw each other:
What do I drink:
When is my birthday:
What was your first impression of upon meeting me:
Do I have any siblings:
What's one of my favorite things to do:
Am I funny:
What's my favorite type of music:
What is the best feature about me:
Am I shy or outgoing:
Am I a rebel or do I follow the rules:
Do I have any special talents:
Would you consider me a friend/good friend:
Would you call me preppy, average, sporty, punk, hippie, glam, nerdy, snobby, or something else (what):
What is a memory we have once had:
Have you ever hugged me:
Do you miss me...do you think i miss you:
What is my favorite food:
Have you ever had a crush on me:
If there was one good nickname for me, what would it be:
What's your favorite memory of me:
Who do I like right now:
What is my worst habit:
If you and I were stranded on a deserted island, what one thing would I bring?
Are we friends:
Will you repost this so I can do it for you?:

Monday, November 3, 2008

Eighteen

Segment 1 :Vote
I understand that by the time anyone reads this, it will be to late for it to affect anyone, but i feel the need to post it. Not because i have to explain myself, this is my spiritual and civic duty, in other words, my God called me to vote this way, and its the best for my country as i believe it should be.
I'm Voting Third Party. It's widely considered to be a bad idea to vote third party. I have heard many times that its a "vote for the other side". I find this to be a bad reason not to vote for Baldwin (or any other third party candidate). You are telling me that if I vote for McCain, who I strongly dislike, then that's the way to keep Obama from winning, and vice versa. But if i dislike them both equally, then by Voting third party, and thereby voting for the other side, i have given my vote to whichever candidate wins as well as to the candidate i actually support.
And another thing: How is a vote for anyone not Democrat, in a state that statistically goes democratic in the electoral college going to help anyone but the candidate that vote is for. Let me explain. If a person is voting for McCain so their Vote isn't wasted, the "effectiveness" of a mccain vote in a democratic state is a moot point. If Obama wins, its as expected, we are a Democrat state, and your McCain Vote. If McCain wins, then he didn't need your "unwasted" vote. It makes more sense to vote for something than against the worse of two evils.
I would ask any MidMichigan person who is Voting for Jack Hoogendyk (the underdog by far next to Carl Levin), why they think a third party Vote is wasted. Its the Same thing. Third Party supports you, but its the underdog, and they wont win. Here is my Call to Christians at the polls. God has always called us to do what is right even if it looks like we aren't going to win. It's HIS election. Whether we win or not, we have to support the candidate who supports God. That is all any believer needs to know. Think about that tomorrow before you write off Baldwin.

Segment 2: Children

"My mom says that i used to laugh at her jokes, but since i became a teenager i don't anymore. To this i calmly think: I laughed at your jokes when i laughed at Barney and the Teletubbies. Now that was great TV. Didn't they win an Emmy or something for the comedy in those shows?"

"I find it odd that homeschoolers can vote for Jack Hoogendyk, the serious underdog, but wont vote third party because they think Baldwin doesn't have very good chances"

Segment 3: Constitution
http://www.baldwin08.com/


Segment 4: Birthday
I can say easily that Nov. 1 2008 was one of the most fun days i have ever had. I didn't think anything could beat line dancing at SSI. Line Dancing with my parents and friends did. I am so grateful to my mom for putting out birthday celebration together. I love her so much.
Four of my sisters made it, and i had a blast with them. I owe my family alot. Especially my new family. God has been building a group of friends around me, Anna, Emily, Anthony and Laura, who have all adopted me as a brother. The last sibling relationship I had died because of the mistakes i made, and it probably wouldn't have helped me.
This week has held alot of revelations for me. I wont go through all of them or what all happened to me surrounding my eighteenth birthday. But i do have to mention the conclusion. A week ago i was hiding a very serious depression inside myself. I was angry at myself for so many reasons. But events that led up to saturday made me think about things.
I realized As i watched my friends dance that i was happy. Not just happy in the moment, but really happy deep inside my being. The way I haven't been for years now. Its not a complete happiness. I'm still going through and working through so many things, but the good part is that i am actually working through them. I don't feel stuck anymore. I'm not angry or sad about how i messed up or who i am.

I guess this is the part of growing up that i actually believe should happen. Eighteen i may be, but i'm no adult. Maybe one day i will be, but as of now i will remain a child, regardless what the government says.

Segment 5: Nathanael
Usually I reserve this space for a piece of a story in my head. Well i will continue that tradition, however this story isn't as fictional. It may sound a little strange, but a friend of mine and i realized this is how we think. There are three "nathanaels" in my mind. not personalities necessarily, more moods or character traits. Let me explain
Nate (n): the creative, energetic, attention-loving child. he will never grow up and always be the source of love inside me
Nathan(N): The mature (ish), organized responsible caretaker of the mind. Structured and thoughtful.
Firefly/Antien (A): The Mixture of the two, though significantly darker, who represents the subdued, side, but is most prevalent, and is the emotional center

n: I had fun saturday. So many people there to see and talk to and play with. it was fun watching them all spin around outside.

A: its called dancing, and we all were there, we all had fun. and not just the dancing. things are really looking up

N: You enjoyed being with our "family" antien. Seeing Laura and Emily and Anna and Anthony. And Nate, you just thought it was about you.

n: well it was a little about me. and i'm not so sure about anthony. he scares me.

N: Thats because he thinks, little one. intelligent people scare you

n: anna-sister thinks and she doesn't scare me, same with Laura-sister. Emily-sister too for that matter.

A: thats because they are girls for one, and you have always gotten along better with girls than guys. Anthony is just fine. One of the best guy friends we have.

N: nate is sush a mammas boy

A: Leave him alone, its true for me too i suppose. You are the only one who insists on rejecting the idea of our new family.

n: me?

N: No, me, selfish little thing... its not about you, nate

A: and i'm supposed to be the mean one. honestly you two are like oil and water.

n: *pouts*

A: Oi Veigh, you two get annoying.

N: Yeah we do, sorry

n: *mumbles* i'm not sorry

A: Nathan, what was your favorite part of the party.

n: ill bet it was getting to look like he was good at playing SET in front of people who hadn't played before

N: Shut up, kid. Seeing Anna and Emily get along so well. i was a bit worried about them.

A: we all were. we want our sisters to get along

n: Antien, what do you think the difference between our new "family" and... other "family"

N: if i weren't in the same head with you i would be very confused by what you just said little tyke.

A: You Mean with our past surrogate siblings? The difference was we wanted those friendships. We sought out someone who cold understand us. when we found them, we idolized the friendship

N: i remember that. it was like you two had never had a friend before. so pathetic.

A: there was some truth to that, though. sure we have friends in the literal sense, but not anyone as close as we wanted. we wanted it so badly. with the Eruseldon's-

n: whats?

A: its the name Nathan and Anna came up for the group tonight.. the "new family" as you call them... anyways, with them, we didn't see after it so hard. the family sortof formed out of mutual friendship, and wasn't so intense. therefore we didn't idolize it and destroy it.

n: i'm confused

N: we know

End.
So its a bit confusing, but that is a glimpse into my mind as it thinks about the party. take it all with a grain of salt, cause its raw feeling and thought...


Segment 6:
Don't tell me this is your last chance to change
'Cause if you do, then you would be telling a lie...but...

I warned you
What could happen if you should decide
To live your life from 9 to 5
And I mourn you
For the detail that is left unsaid
Is a reminder of the time you bled


They sold you
Everything you need to fix you up
And you feel good now but you can't wake up
They found a way to reassure you
(That everything would be okay)
Reach out today now I emplore you to remember who you are


So you felt it, but you don't know
Why you can't explain at all
Why you felt it 'cause you don't know
No, you don't know

Break the walls between building atrophy
Causing all your problems to recede
break the walls between
(Break the walls between)
Causing all your pain
(Causing all your pain)
You'll never learn...

Return to days when you knew you still felt alive
Reveal the way you felt when you could look inside

Take Back
The beat in your heart
Why Fight
When you can't be bought


(Break the walls between building atrophy
Causing all your problems to recede
Break the walls between
Causing all your pain)