Anymore

Segment 1: Transform
Its no big secret that, as a general principle, i cannot stand people in my own age group. Granted there are exceptions, but as I don't make a practice of Judging people in groups, exceptions are bound to happen. It is not contradictory to say that i "don't like people my age" then to say that I don't judge people in groups, as it might seem. A general characteristic that is overlayed on my generation, is the sheep-like, cookie cutter mentality that public schools generate. The fact is I can judge a good portion of the population, without ever meeting them, because they are trained to be clones of one another. Teenagers are sheep, they follow each other around.
One of the most common "issues" among my age group, is authority. Teens on the whole continually shout for "independence", they want to be treated as adults who are unique and individual people. They want to be able to choose for themselves who they are going to be, to make their own identities, which they usually model after their friends. In simple terms, the sheep want to be free to follow each other around pointlessly.
In an attempt to gain their individual identity by force, young people have begun forming their own subcultures, specifically designed to be different from one another. The Jock, the nerd, the em, the goth, the prep, whatever it may be, are all expressions of either blind conformity or ignorant conformity. Blind conformity is exactly what its name suggests, an unknown, automatic acceptance that everyone is supposed to be the same, and the adjustment to become like everyone else. Ignorant, or reverse conformity is when a person seeks to be different, and thus changes who they are to counteract what they see as "the norm". The argument is that a person can only be unique if they aren't like anyone else. While the idea itself may be wrong, it isn't the cause of their conformity. They say that they are unique because they are different, but they have modeled themselves as opposites, allowing what they don't want to be to shape what they are. A person who changes their body, act differently on purpose, or accomplishes something for the sole reason of being different, has allowed something to shape them, and they are not being who they are. Conformity, for this article, will be defined as allowing something to shape or mold you to a specific way that is not your true or original form.
Sociology defines Socialization as "the process by which a persons identity and personality are formed". What a truly devastating prospect that is. The entirety of who we are is circumstantial? Perhaps there is truth in that if i had different friends, or had gone to public school, i would be a very different person, but would I not still be the fun-loving, emotionally dramatic, generally weird, pleasantly creepy person I am? Whether or not the sociological truth of socialization is true or not is debatable; however, because of its common use, it seems that society believes it. I am who I am because of where I am.
This is a very humanistic, evolutionist idea, which perhaps explains why so many people subscribe to it. Because if it is true, the there is no such thing as true individuality, there is only adaption, and we are all various forms of the same animal. How very sad.
Now one might think, due to my abhorrence of the Public education/Liberal, Government sponsored indoctrination system, that I blame the Public Schools for the development of carbon copy people. It is logical to assume this, as the process of mass producing education can only result in mass producing minds that are all very similar and do not know how to truly find themselves. I would say that people taught to think, but in fact they are: they are taught how to think and what to think, and any person who thinks differently, or disagrees with the common thought is intolerant, and therefore should not be tolerated. But I digress.
Here is a simple fact about me and my political ideas. I don't blame the public schools for anything. The are merely and extension of the federal and state governments, who I also do not blame for anything. I'll say that again: I do not blame the government for anything. You see, I believe that the government, state, federal, or local, is not America. The people are America, and the people truly control the country. This is the foundational idea behind my personal political ideology. Any problem in America is the responsibility of its people, not its government. The problem is that the people of America have become lazy and apathetic.
We complain about the government, Blaming our problems on it, But we forget that we are the foundation of this nation, and have passed our responsibilities to a governing body we created, originally, to serve us. See the flaw? We give our national problems tot he government, for them to fix, even though we blame the government for causing them. This is a sign of a weak minded and lazy citizenry.
We created Public education, so that everyone could be educated to the same common level for free, so they never have to learn the difficulty that learning really is, because we were just to lazy to force ourselves to be educated the hard way. The nation that was founded on the desire and work brave men to become independent, now relies on a social system built on common conformity and dependence on a government to socialize and educate the individuality right out of us.

Segment 2: Help

"Never ask customer services or tech support if you are being an idiot, the answer violates their 'friendliness policy'"

"It does not require a majority to prevail, but rather an irate, tireless minority keen to set brush fires in people's minds."

"I am good at everything... Except birthing babies" Tim Hunt

Segment 3:
http://www.gsnt.org/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3R7wNyrWCA&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G725c8If_k4

Segment 4: Driven
This past week or two have been very simple for me, yet at the same time i have had to face things i wasn't ready for. Typically my worries are present and material, meaning they are worries about what is happening now and what is going wrong. The lack of activity over the past twelve days for me was very relaxing, but it gave me time to contemplate and analyse things that I hadn't really expected to.
Every few months i will look in the mirror and see an entirely new and different person than before, and thats not a bad thing. But what i only now am beginning to understand is that these changes i see in myself, wether others see them or not, are going to change what i do about things, and what i want to do. So, inevitably, i am facing losing/giving up things that i used to love and want.
I had planned on missing week two of SSI this year, for a family gathering for my Grandfathers 80th birthday. Now i am wondering if there was a point in doing any of the three weeks. There are things and people and memories from years past that both make me want to go, and stay away at the same time. Also, having done literally everything but instruct and act as a chaperone, i wonder what my purpose in going would be? As i feel like a different person every few months, i don't know who or what i will be come june, or how i will feel about SSI. For now i feel that my time there has come and gone, and i need to move on.
I have given up my financial goals because of the lack of one job, but now it seems that i may need to find a second job anyways, as my current one may not last. Thins are a bit up in the air when it come sot my employment, and i recently shelled out a substantial amt of money for a few things (see last post*). I would appreciate prayer as i look for a new job.
I once again have a new set of friends than i did some months ago, and these friends have brought me a little internal peace. my relationships with my older friends have all changed, generally in a good way, though there are exceptions.

On saturday, i spent most of the day with my family (Eruseldon's) sledding and talking, and generally doing family things. Then I drove an hour and a half to Adiran for a party, which I enjoyed despite some awkward moments. The most exciting part of the day, however, was on the way home form adrian. round about 11. It had been snowing nearly an hour, and i was the only car within sight on US 127. Apparently the deer that crossed in front of me was more comfortable on the road than i was. I thought of the phrase "deer in the headlights", which i always took to mean a shocked, terrified look. Never again will i use the phrase for that. I caught the creatures eye just before i swerved, and i swear to you, it looked like it was challenging me. Cockly, 6 point, bambi freak.
Anyways I swerved to avoid twig-head, which i did successfully, at the cost of my control over my Buick. I'm so glad i didn't get that tiny, lightweight car i wanted for its gas mileage. In any case, i was still going fast enough to cause my car to do two complete rotations on the road before stopping. I didn't end up in he ditch. i sat there for five minutes while my heartrate slowed, the got out to make sure i didn't do anything to my car (which i have named Persivle, by the way). Still no one was in sight, so i just drove away. i was a bit jumpy and didn't go above 55 for the last half hour i drove, but i made it in one piece, then preceded to leave the indoor dome lights of my car on over the weekend. I blame the deer.

Segment 5: Antien
Sometimes he wondered why he had the two expansive wings which grew six feet each form his back, yet folded down to be concealed beneath his dark leather coat. Flying was easier without them, though he made a regular practice of using them anyways, so the new muscles that controlled the feathered limbs wouldn't atrophy. At this moment, though he wished he could use them to counteract, and perhaps change the massive wind current that brought torrent is snow down from the clouds. If he created enough wind, perhaps he would blow the snow away and wouldn't have to shovel... He shivered intentionally, to give the appearance of being cold. It wasn't as though the wind or snow, or even cold usually bothered him, he'd just as soon leave it be and go inside, but his car would never be able to get out of the garage with so much snow on the driveway. He hated pretending too need the old silver Buick to get around, but the masquerade was nessesary. Alot of apearances were. Even now he was focusing on maintaining an alchemic reaction which concealed his long, pointed ears, sharp teeth, and the two horns which curled up a quarter inch form his lower lip. The reaction also make is face look a little red, and caused a drip of liquid to run from his nose (the part he hated most), all to give the impression to anyoen who may have been watching, that he acually was cold and shoveling hte snow was difficult. It was ironic that he had to spend more energy to make it look liek hard work, than to actually do the work.
He tensed as he felt it. The meteor entering earch atmosphere, headed, generally, in his direction. He always felt these thing happen, it was like a seventh sense. "Limited kinetic precognition" Alyssa had once called it. That inexpicable knwoledge he had of thins movign around him. This was the fouth Astrological event that he had to prevent since thanksgiving. Someone was calling them, but not magically, he would have noticed (that was his sixths sence, detecting metaphysical activity).
He quickly scanned the immediate area again to make sure no one was watching, then listened for satalite signals, to see if anyonw was watching that way. After a biref moment, when he was satisfied that no such onlookers were present, he released a buste of kenetic energy from his feet, pushing him into the air toward the oncoming space rock, simultaneously dropping the reaction that hid his nonhuman features, and releasing his wings, whish tore off his coat as they streched and expanded....


Segment 6: Air
Well if you told me you were drowning
I would not lend a hand
I've seen your face before my friend
But I don't know if you know who I am
Well I was there and I saw what you did
I saw it with my own two eyes
So you can wipe of the grin
I know where you've been
Its all been a pack of lies

I can feel it
Coming in the air tonight
Hold on
I've been waiting for this moment
For all my life
Hold on, Hold on

Well I remember
I remember don't worry
How could I ever forget
Its the first time
The last time
We ever met
But I know the reason why you keep me silenced up
No you don't fool me
Cause the hurt doesn't show
But the pain still grows
Its no stranger to you and me